My Dad (Father's Day Edition Blog)

Recently, my friends and I filmed this:



If anyone is interested, I'm playing the nerdy guy, Patrick of CHINA SMOKE was playing my friend, my dad was played by Mr. K, and lastly, the film was directed by Chris "DJ Gouki" Plummer. So, if any of you guys had heard of Moon Jelly Records, that short "more-annoying-than-actually-funny" skit would know that was basically the whole company right there.

The "plot" (if you can really call it that) was my brainchild. Again, the whole idea behind it was to be more annoying than actually funny. It seems to have caught on, being as a couple of our friends could not stop saying "my dad" in a nerdy voice for awhile.

My friend Andrew and I were hanging out the other day, and he asked me, "Where did you even come with it?" Truthfully, I guess it was too stupid that it came off as original. Truthfully, I would dare say that a part of it is autobiographical.

No, I've never been caught drunk by my parents. No, I've never actually been beaten with a fondue fork. And no, my parents do not prohibit me eating cheese for a week when I'm in deep shit.

I've been spanked by a newspaper before, and they used to scare me with the snapping sound of a belt, but overall, I wasn't a "good" kid per se, but too much of a "weird" kid for them to handle. What could my parents do when I drew their Christmas cards, and there were skeletons and tombstones all over the place? Could my parents really yell at me for accidentally breaking a buddha statue when I was peacefully waltzing with it?

I guess what I'm trying to say what is autobiographical about it is that fear of your dad. When I was a rowdy kid, my dad used to threaten to beat me up if I misbehaved. It's not so much that I can't beat up my dad. He's pretty old and his bones aren't as good as they used to be. But really, at the end of the day, who really wants to punch your father?

It took me a long time to admit this, but I see a lot of myself in my dad. A lot of people are actually a lot like their parents, but hardly anyone ever wants to admit it. My dad is just as weird, just as stubborn, and just as borderline obsessive compulsive as I am. He's always on the move: I hardly ever see him take a day off. Every time he's free from work, he's always fixing or cleaning something in the house.

I'm the same way. Usually when I have a vacation, 75% of the time I don't feel like hanging out with people. I actually prefer locking myself in my room and working on music and art.

And here's the key thing about the two of us: some times, I think we work hard at the things we do just so that we can say we gave it 110% When it comes to things you care about, there's no half-assing in the Ng family work ethic.

I sometimes think my dad really just works hard just for the right to say he's been "selfless" and a "good guy." I share this condition. I think it's a mental illness really, but sometimes I think I give of myself to people (usually friends), just for the sake of being able to say, "I'm giving more." And of course, both me and my dad expect reciprocation and equal effort from everyone, but realistically, the world does not work that way.

The major question here is: do I love my dad? It's really an awkward question to answer, but I would honestly say "yes." It's truly an unconditional love. I'm not saying everyone should love their dad, because that would honestly silly. You can't choose your family, and so I feel, no one ever has to commit to loving their family.

He's weird and goofy, and I make jokes about him all the time. It's definetly easier this way, because if I took some of the things he says to heart, my dad would come off as this mega-jerk, and he's really not. I may not agree with his actions and ideals, but that's always the old vs. the new. (I don't want to digress much, but if you ever read Toni Morrison's novel, Sula. . . my dad would probably lose his leg for me and call it "love," but wouldn't particarly be an affectionate type of person.)

Anyways, the whole point here was the celebrate my dad, and hopefully I did so. Will I probably go back to butting heads with him by the end of the day? Probably. That's usually how it goes for holidays.